I've been thinking about friendships lately. Probably because I'm in a new city and making new friends is part of what you do when you move a few hundred miles from your ol' buddies.
Two opposing sayings about friendship come to mind - "Opposites attract," and "Birds of a Feather Flock Together." Is one more true than the other? It seems like a combination to me. I don't think people usually look for people who are exactly like them (as if that would be possible to find) but it does seem that some similarities help people connect quicker.
Do you ever think about the people who you're close to and how you got that way? I mean you can't be best friends with everyone, so how did you happen to become close with your bestest buds? I recently shared with Casey my developing theory about how people become friends.
Here's my theory: I think three main factors come to play (these aren't earth shattering). 1. Your interest in becoming friends with the other person. 2. Their reciprocated interest in being your friend. 3. The time both of you are willing to commit to getting to know each other and becoming close.
Yeah, I know it's a no-frills theory, but I'm a practical kind of girl. Now, don't get me wrong, I definitely think there's more involved in maintaining a friendship (love, loyalty, fun, etc.) but what I'm talking about is whether two people become friends in the first place. I especially think number three is essential - because even if both people like each other, a real friendship won't take root because the time wasn't carved out to make it happen. And on the other hand, even if two people don't initially think they'd be friends, if they spend enough time together there's a good chance they'll get close.
For someone like me - that is someone who would prefer a few "bosom friends" (I watched Anne of Green Gables a lot as a kid) as opposed to a crowd of casual chums - this means being patient because close friendships take time.
On a different topic, at some point I really will post pictures again. We've still been having computer problems with our laptop. I think it got that Koobface virus from Facebook. Booo to hackers and other such villainous hoodlums - they are not my friends.
1 comment:
I have to agree with part three of your theory being the most important. It is when you are able to invest time in one another that friendships are strengthened or weakened. And those special rare people who find time to invest in others are the ones who will never be lonely. I hope you have found a bosom friend or two in Texas. You deserve them.
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